The Burger Baron serves up another pre-lunch smash hit!

By The Burger Baron

Love a bit of spice in your life to wake you up first thing in the morning? Consider treating yourself to some loaded, decadent, yet surprisingly simple and easy smashburgers tacos!

Here’s the cheat sheet…

Smash a patty onto your pan or grill with a soft tortilla on top, once golden brown, flip, add your melty cheese and fold, briefly grilling the back of the tortilla on both sides to melt the cheese. 

Feeling like you deserve a little more for breakfast – of course you do! Perhaps grill some bacon and/or egg at the same time. 

Remove, peel it open (witness an amazing cheese pull beyond any grilled cheese you've ever seen), add your fillings. 

Above are the components for one of my typical breakfast burgers but here’s what I pack into each taco:

• 1 rasher streaky Bacon
• 1 small egg
• 1/2 a hash brown (extra crunch!)
• Pickled jalapenos
• Spicy salsa
• Burger sauce

This little masterpiece is whipped up in a matter of minutes, but alas, the process of consuming sadly also only lasts a matter of minutes. Zero regrets though, this is truly a transformative breakfast experience!

With all the lashings (that you may already have in your fridge), this dish ticks every flavour box: salty, sweet, savoury, umami, sour, with added creamy unctuousness from the cheese and burger sauce and a spicy kick from the salsa and the jalapenos to really elevate the endorphins. It's a wild ride that must be tried. 

What a way to start the day!

By House of Goff 

Last week, the good lady wife informed me that she was craving a hearty steak for dinner, so I dutifully journeyed by car to the local supermarket (that normally maintains a balance of quality and value) to see what sort of bargain I could scrounge up. 

Imagine my abject horror upon sighting a tray of thick-cut RUMP steak for $26.99/kg!!! [Ed. This is your first written warning for overuse of exclamation marks… but sheesh, that’s getting up there] It was only a few years ago that I could find whole rumps for $12-16/kg, knowing where to look, but it seems those days are sadly, behind us. Thankfully, I managed to find a tray of lovely looking thick porterhouse steaks on the shelf below for $20.99/kg, a price I could stomach. I'm sure there's many Feasters out there who have also felt the pinch of rising beef prices. 

As a lover of beef myself, it's something that's weighed heavily on my mind of late. After my rump steak price shock, I wandered through the aisles, contemplating a future that - for the sake of fiscal responsibility - might include a noticeable decrease in steak consumption. 

However, as I passed through the Mexican section I was struck by a moment of inspiration. No, it wasn't a new hot sauce coming into stock [Ed. We may need an intervention, your hot sauce addiction is real, man!]. It was a memory of something I had cooked in recent months, and the ingredients with which I could attempt a fresh take on an old favourite. 

Steak. Tacos. 

Hear me out. What is a person to do when they regularly crave the taste and texture of delicious steak, but don't want to break the bank? 

a) Add more vegetables to their plate 
b) Eat a piece of fruit 
c) Salad? 
d) Steak tacos 

If done properly, steak tacos allow the flavour and the texture of the meat to shine through, along with a variety of flavours including salsa and cream to make for a party in your mouth, while stretching your protein dollar further. 

Allow me to introduce you to one of my now favourite go-to beef cuts - the skirt steak. It is traditionally the most popular cut of choice for steak tacos and Chinese stir fry, but, in my experience, it needs to be handled with some care for best results. 

After my beefy epiphany (ebeephany?) [Ed. That is QUITE enough of that – second written warning], I rushed for a can of chipotle chillies in adobo sauce and a can of tomatillos (the little green and slightly sour cousin of the tomato) and hurried back to the meat section. I also managed to find a delightful looking 1kg, vac-sealed bag of skirt steak for $19.99/kg - now we're talking! 

Here’s what’s up, what’s next and what’s delicioso! 

Now to walk you through my process for preparing steak tacos and two different versions of a salsa; one when you're seeking good value, the other for when you're looking to impress a group with some flavours they may be yet to encounter.

Core Ingredients: 

½ to 1kg of Skirt Steak 

Tacos (I prefer soft so as not to mask the texture of the steak) 

1 Medium Brown Onion 

Sour Cream 

Cheese (Grated fresh) 

Coriander (unless it tastes like soap to you) 

Oil/Salt/Pepper/Vinegar 

Salsa Verde (Value): 

2 Green Capsicum 

Handful of Jalapenos (to suit heat level, pickled jalapenos work here too) 

1 Tsp Ground Cumin 

Smoky Tomatillo Salsa (Bougie): 

1 Can of Chipotle Chiles in Adobo 

1 Can of Tomatillos (6 or so fresh ones are better but good luck finding any) 

Garlic 

1A) Salsa Verde Option 

• So to start off, if you're trying the salsa verde, crank your oven to 220°C and line a tray with baking paper. 
• Then just throw your capsicum and jalapenos in there with a drizzle of oil until soft and slightly blackened. 
• Remove and place in a covered bowl to steam for 10-15 minutes. This will allow you to peel the skins off easily (if you're using chopped pickled jalapenos, don't bother for those). 
• When that's done, add your roasted goodies to a food processor with a quarter of your brown onion, a quarter cup (125mL) of water, 1 Tsp of ground cumin, a splash of vinegar (unless you used pickled jalapenos), a small handful of coriander and a generous pinch of salt or two (adjust to taste). If you prefer a lighter, thinner consistency, just add more water. 
• Transfer to a bowl and set aside. 

1B) Smoky Tomatillo Salsa Option 

• Grill your tomatillos in a pan on medium-high with a splash of oil until soft, about 10 minutes 
• Put aside to cool. 
• Add a tsp or two of diced fresh garlic (or a bit more if from a jar) to a food processor, along with 3 chipotle chillies from your can, your cooked tomatillos and a generous pinch of salt 
• Pulse until pureed. You might also like to add 1 Tbsp or so of brown sugar to taste if you'd like to balance the sourness. 
• Transfer to a bowl and set aside.

2) Skirt Steak 

Prep: 

• I find skirt tends to have a lot of silver skin membrane on one or both sides and some hard fat chunks, so I spend five or more minutes removing all that and getting it nice and clean. 
• Give it light oiling and a generous seasoning of salt and pepper. 
• Meanwhile, get a pan or BBQ ripping hot with some oil. 
• If you opted for the "Bougie" salsa, blend up your remaining chiles and adobo sauce in a food processor, and give your steaks a generous brushing over with the resulting paste. 
• Fight back the steak-snob in you that fears pasting brown sauce on a steak will make it taste like a sweet BBQ sauce [Ed. You can almost hear Train grinding his teeth!]. The chipotles will add richness and smokiness that actually complements and enhances the umami flavour of the steak, rather than masking it. [Ed. (giggling) Oh, Train, this is glorious!] 

Cook: 

Now, I might get in trouble for this, as the politically correct answer for how one likes their steak done is generally medium-rare... BUT, I suspect because of the thicker-than-average muscle fibres found in skirt, it tends to turn out more tender if you get it more to the medium end of the medium-rare spectrum. [Ed… sorry Train] 

Rest: 

Allow your steak to rest for at least 5 minutes. 

Slicing: 

Now, this part is particularly crucial for skirt steak. I find when most people go to slice a steak (and you imagine a long rectangle), they simply slice across the shortest direction. If you were to do that with skirt however, you will generally be slicing parallel to the muscle fibres, creating an extremely chewy experience. Because it seems silly and difficult to cut slices down the full, long length of the steak, I tend to split it into thirds or halves first, then identify which direction the muscle fibres are running and slice across/perpendicular to that direction. This means the steak should separate and fall apart in your mouth, rather than your teeth having to break down every muscle fibre. 

Serving: 

Give your sliced steaks a nice salting before serving. 

3) The Rest 

Dice and grill your onion with some oil and a pinch of salt until caramelised and grate your cheese. 

Now, I'm not going to tell you what you can and can't put on a taco, but personally, I find it best to opt out of lettuce and tomato on a steak taco. I would rather preserve the taste and texture of the steak, rather than obfuscate and drown it out with a variety of crunchy, watery ingredients. However, this still leaves room for our salsa and coriander, not to mention our delicious, soft and fat-filled ingredients such as sour cream, grated cheese and even avocado if you like. 

If I could impart one favourite tip of mine in closing, it would be to opt out of microwaving your soft taco wraps. Instead, slap them down, one at a time, straight onto your gas burner or BBQ grill, for 5-10 seconds a side. This will cut back on some of the doughy mouth-feel and enhance the flavour and texture slightly. 

I hope you enjoy this as much as me, and that it helps you find ways of stretching your budget to include some of your favourite protein, perhaps in a fresh and interesting way… Feast on!

The Bearded Canadian, Train, House of Goff & Johnno 

Let’s start with a brief, one-paragraph history lesson/backstory: 

It was a spring day in 2016 on Sydney’s Circular Quay when Train scrawled “Feast on Beasts” on a diner napkin before returning his weary gaze to the immensely dissatisfying salad double-parked in front of his tiny steak. He hankered for a truly beautiful steak, perfectly cooked in a kitchen full of passionate cooks, thrilled to be alive and creating meat dishes, and embracing their calling. “I can’t be the only one thinking like this,” Train lamented. 

Fast-forward past a trip to IP Australia, a transcontinental relocation and 4 years later, Feast on Beasts was born: a tight-knit community of passionate meat lovers, presenting beef, pork, lamb and poultry-related reviews, rumours, feasting facts and fiction and fashion – and these are the people that helped turn that miserable lunch into a Feast for the senses. 

Train is always hungry, loves a garish feasting shirt and believes that an appetite is like any other muscle in the body – it can be trained to get bigger, stronger and more formidable. But it takes effort! 

Talent/superpower: defeating science with unusual cooking methods, banter, never giving up – at the feasting table. 

Specialty: steak, crackling pork loin bites with seasoned crackling, cold hard opinions. 

The Bearded Canadian sports a beard that would put most lumberjacks to shame but is known for his panoramic range of culinary tastes and insatiable appetite for gustatory parlour games and challenges. 

Talent/superpower: culinary creativity, seeing beyond the carcass or cut before him and dreaming up enticing entrees, mains and stunning starters. 

Specialty: Ham, pork shoulders, poultry curios, repartee, Canadian accents. 

House of Goff knows things that we don’t when it comes to burgers, hot sauce and the science of meaty repasts. Genuinely humble and soft spoken, his dishes scream perfection, attention to detail and rich flavour. 

Talent/superpower: maintaining a measured, logical approach to preparing and presenting feasts, even if chaos abounds; and consuming (and relishing) fiery hot sauces. 

Specialty: Smash burgers, chicken wings in many and varied um… variations, food (okay meat) science. 

Johnno the enthusiastic smoker, brisket whisperer and pork platter presenter with the golden olfactory senses, deconstructs sauces, rubs and recipes in general, with an unsettling confidence and unerring accuracy. Talent/superpower: the easy answer is, plating up peerless portions of pork and brisket but it’s the detail, the ingredients, the flavour combinations that set his work apart from the rest. 

Specialty: Brisket, pork, chicken varietals and lesser-known beast-based meals – buffalo, crocodile to name two.

How to transform a smash burger into a transformative experience 

by House of Goff 

“My baseline expectation of a burger is that it becomes something far more desirable than the sum of its ingredients, something that elevates our expectations past mere bread with ingredients in close proximity.” House of Goff with a harsh-but-fair analysis of an area in which civilisation is letting itself down… badly! 

Like anything, a smash burger can be a triumph or a train wreck. I can’t remember having too many burgers that fell between these two polar extremes. As with most of the FoB meat dishes we help people create, there are some basic rules I’d recommend you stick to in order to avoid the train wreck and instead, enjoy cooking and adore eating a smash burger that will take your breath away. 

I like to keep things fairly simple and straightforward when sharing burger tips and because we’re all fiercely competitive but extremely respectful of each other’s skills, I’ll subtly suggest that 6 tips should be enough to keep you on the straight and delicious. (Ed. Obviously a veiled dig at Train’s 10 tips on porterhouse prep guide.) 

1. Buy the fattiest mince you can find. Remember, fat equals flavour. That said, maybe curb your burger enthusiasm and consumption once you’ve had two (not a doctor but still…) 

2. When forming the patties into spheres, try to touch the meat as little as possible. You’re creating a masterpiece here and too much poking and prodding will rob the patty of flavour and character. 

3. Mix NOTHING into the mince, add seasoning (coarse salt alone is sufficient) ONLY AFTER smashing. If you feel you can’t resist adding things to the mince, then you should call a halt to proceedings, reset and fix your sights on making meatballs instead. This step demands unwavering discipline, an iron will and a gentle touch. Weird? Yes. Feel a bit awkward now? I get it. But focus on burger nirvana – it will be worth it! 

4. Cook only on the hottest parts of your grill to achieve a delicious brown crust, flip and apply cheese once the edges have turned light brown. 

5. Once said brown crust has formed on the second side, remove, stack multiple patties together, and serve on a potato bun with pickles. To paraphrase a great, great man, “I worry that you heard, serve on a bun. I said, serve on a potato bun… with pickles. Gorgeous." 

6. Smirk knowingly. Soon you’ll be basking in the glow of your fellow feasters’ adulation and you will thoroughly deserve it. Feast on!

House of Goff is also known for his mastery in the chicken wing department as well as a reckless but enduring love for fiendishly fiery hot sauces and will no doubt be rating his faves in coming editions.